Grieving Process - A Poem

When I let you in

And felt what is was like for you to swim fiercely in the sadness I felt in my stomach  as I kept my head above water

pounding loudly with the anger in my chest

as I screamed out

When it felt like you had no where else to go

I heard your name

Everything became clear and you paused for just a moment

You were trying to reach my heart

Grief.

My stomach was still sad

And my chest was still angry

My heart broke

But what filled the cracks was something else

I was confused how swimming, pounding, breaking, I can find something that feels bigger than myself

That can help me swim deeper and

yell louder and hold so much.

A source that brings me clarity, strength, warmth.

I knew the name of that energy.

Love.

When I see my sadness, anger, grief, I see yours too. Standing by your side and hearing the things you have lost . I feel it too.

I knew that everyone holds their breath just like I do.

I know what it’s  like to get stuck

To not explore the depths of my grief.

I’m reminded by this when I inhale and pause.

But my grief keeps me fighting

and my love keeps me hoping

Dreaming of the the collective exhale.

When everyone can breath

freely and together

As we are supposed to.

Liberation.